Forgiveness.

Working out on Monday morning after an uneventful weekend. Thoughts running through my head as tunes pounded in my ears on the elliptical machine. Sweating. Moving. Sweating. Breathing. Thinking of myself as daughter. Thinking of myself as parent. Thinking of my parents. Thinking of my children. My parents did the best job they could. Nine children. None could have any part of the parent all to them self. I move on. I forgive my parents for wrong decisions and for being one of nine children. I hope they forgive me for the disobediences.  I only wish I didn't hurt them. That is the one thing I would change if I could. I was a fairly good, obedient daughter. But a few times. Well, we all go through it trying to find our own way. I grew up between. Between two very different sisters. Influenced by both.
Parenting my own children. I think I understood growing up better than my parents did. I think I understood that the child will always push the envelope. Always rebel, at some point. I expected it. I looked for it. It begins when the baby is cut apart from you. For all their life they are working towards being apart.  Independence. As it should be. Few things I would change. I wish I had put more trust in their decisions. I wish I had made them feel more important. More powerful. Made them feel like they could do anything. I wish I had given them better and bigger wings. Maybe there would not be one iota of difference. Maybe not.
********
Artwork for the day. Imitation is the greatest form of flattery. I discovered Jo Lynch and have imitated the artist. And love it.

Water color painting of seahorse. 

I am falling in love with water colors again.