Thursday, November 19, 2015

Missed it by that much.

I thought today was my surgery anniversary. But. When I looked back at my blog I realized that it was actually yesterday. So. One day late I am giving thanks that I am a year out from the back surgery. And. I want you to know that I literally thank God every day for how good I feel.

It doesn't seem like a year has gone by. The memory feels very recent. Yet my body knows. I just can not emphasize enough how good it feels to put my feet on the floor in the morning and walk and move without pain.

Going through all the back pain and issues last year taught me empathy. For that I am not sorry. I am thankful that I can listen to others and connect with them and know just how they feel. I understand what constant pain feels like. I am sorry for people who can not get relief. I remember wanting people to understand that my hurt was significant and would not go away. I was scared people were getting sick of my complaining. I tried to not say how I really felt. Yet when I did, I felt that people thought I was getting better when, in fact, that wasn't true. I was afraid to talk about it, and afraid to not talk about it.

For how good I feel right this minute.
Thank you, Lord.

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